


If You Could Read My Mind

by EdosianOrchids901



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Angsty secret love letter, Lonely Garak, M/M, POV First Person, Pining Garak, Pre-Relationship, things Garak wishes he could tell Julian
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-18
Updated: 2018-07-18
Packaged: 2019-06-12 09:51:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15337311
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EdosianOrchids901/pseuds/EdosianOrchids901
Summary: A love letter written to Julian, with no intention of sending it





	If You Could Read My Mind

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written during April 2017

My dear Doctor,

 

Sometimes when we’re together, I find myself pondering. If I told you this, or if you ever happened to read this letter, your eyes would light up. What do you ponder, Garak? you’d want to know. The mysteries of the universe, our place in the cosmos?

Nothing so grand, I’m afraid. It’s the little things. The little things dance around in my mind as we dine together, walk together, talk together. 

When you give me that sweet, foolish smile, do you know that my heart melts with affection and fondness?

When your eyes light up with passion and excitement as you tell me about your latest excursion or project, do you realize that the joy with which you approach life makes me want to follow you on any adventure, no matter how wild?

When you show care and consideration for me, do you know how badly I crave kindness? Can you see my hunger for your gentleness? Does my overwhelming gratitude show in my eyes, or am I successful at hiding it?

When you look at me fondly, do you realize how starved for affection I’ve been all my life? Do you know that every bit of attention you direct my way only makes me want to follow you more, like a hound waiting for scraps?

When you rest your hand on my back or shoulder as we walk, are you aware of how rarely I’ve known gentle touch? Do you know how badly I long for simple, friendly physical contact?

When you call my name, do you know how much the mere sound of your voice lifts my spirits? That just listening to you talk about anything, no matter how mundane, eases the loneliness and pain of exile?

When you stop by to visit me in my shop, do you know how strongly I’ve always desired connection with others? Do you have any idea how badly I’ve longed to have even this level of intimacy? Do you realize that your open, friendly, accepting nature draws me to you like a moth to flame? Do you recognize how much I treasure every second of our time together? Do you know that whenever I’m alone, I wish I was in your company?

When you first invited me to lunch, did you know that it felt like water to a dying man? Did you know how much that simple gesture would mean to me? Did you know how deeply I craved your friendship?

And now for the most important question of all, my dear Doctor… do you realize that I’m falling in love with you?

 

Affectionately yours,  
Garak


End file.
